Satire: Kalamazoo Country Got Denied Media Passes To Ribfest

I'm fixin' to blow a gasket over here because the current on air-radio stations get to go to Kalamazoo Ribfest with fancy media passes, and we don't. Now that doesn't make any gosh darn sense because we used to belong to it. Now granted, we got taken off the air some time ago to make way for Kalamazoo's Greatest Hits, but this is like a hit to the groin. After all, where would they be without us? Even though we aren't on air, we're still here digitally. That's gotta' count for somethin', right?

I know for a fact that our Kalamazoo Country tent and pop-up banner are just sittin' there, collecting dust and cobwebs in the garage, and I bet that if you peeled the wrap on their station vehicle, you would see what USED to be the Kalamazoo Country car. That just won't do. BBQ & Country? Is there not a better fit?

Get our free mobile app

They got some real hair on their peaches if they think they can take our banner and set it up at their festival without bringing some of us back on. This is no doubt because the years of entertainment we provided them. We started to outshine all the other stations, they knew we needed to be taken out. Well, ya know what? We didn't wanna go anyway. We'll just be here waitin' when y'all come crawlin' back begging us to come next year.

Just don't expect to see us this year, we got better things to do. Have fun at your dumb...awesome festival that we clearly don't care about.

If you hadn't picked up on it yet, this was totally satire. We all need a good laugh every now and then. Enjoy the weekend.